Tuesday, March 15, 2005

Definitions That Make Sense

You'll like some of these better than others, but I'll bet you'll end up telling a few to your friends in the next day or so. -- D.H.

  • ADULT: A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle.
  • BEAUTY PARLOR: A place where women curl up and dye.
  • CANNIBAL: Someone who is fed up with people.
  • CHICKENS: The only animals you eat before they are born and after they are dead.
  • COMMITTEE: A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.
  • DUST: Mud with the juice squeezed out.
  • EGOTIST: Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.
  • HANDKERCHIEF: Cold Storage.
  • INFLATION: Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.
  • MOSQUITO: An insect that makes you like flies better.
  • RAISIN: Grape with a sunburn.
  • SECRET: Something you tell to one person at a time.
  • SKELETON: A bunch of bones with the person scraped off.
  • TOOTHACHE: The pain that drives you to extraction.
  • TOMORROW: One of the greatest labor saving devices of today.
  • YAWN: An honest opinion openly expressed.
  • WRINKLES: Something other people have. You have character lines.
-- Dalton Hammond, with help from Wendy

More of My Jokes