Monday, May 01, 2006

High-Tech Terms Defined

Hi folks. I have cleverly defined some high-tech terms you may have heard but are unclear about. -- D.H.

ADOBE -- Floor plan for Arizona servant quarters
HEWLETT-PACKARD -- The worn-out car your grandfather gave to your uncle Hewlett
PAYPAL -- The workmate you owe $5 to from last week
LAPTOP -- A bar room dance step
PLASMA SCREEN -- Someone barfed too close to the TV
GOOGLE -- (a) A midget who sits on top of a cathedral; (b) many geese; (c) huge number
YAHOO! -- Deep-South translation of "Eureka!"
MACINTOSH -- What a Brit wears with his rubbers
HARD DRIVE -- Five hours on the road with no rest stop.
FLOPPY -- Outdated term; see Viagra
VIAGRA -- Wonder drug suspected of causing headaches in older women
EPSON -- A hangover remedy worth its salt
DOS -- One before Tres
WEB -- What your possum (blindly) walked into
DISK STORAGE -- A Deejay's closets

-- Dalton Hammond