The Way We Were

Another thing that's no fun any more is Male Superiority.

-- Dalton Hammond

Watching our language

If the TV networks don't like the colorful language that professional golfers sometimes use on the air then they shouldn't make them wear microphones.

I believe that a golfer has a God-given right to cuss a golf ball.

-- Dalton Hammond

Since sliced bread

I was wondering...just how good was anything before sliced bread, anyway?

-- Dalton Hammond

The Recession

So why do they call it a 'recession'? It seems to be getting closer.

-- Dalton Hammond

The Tiger Woods Comeback, Part MMX

For those of you out there who were wondering how I knew that Tigger Woods would not make a spectacular comeback, the explanation is very simple:

You can't play at your best when your ex-wife is squeezing you by the gonads.

-- Dalton Hammond

Privacy Settings

"I thought I had fine-tuned my Facebook privacy settings properly but when I went to the bathroom I discovered 5 new friends in my Inbowl."

-- Dalton Hammond

Where did you go, Joe Dimaggio?

It took me a long time to realize that it's not our country any more.

-- Dalton Hammond

Frequent Flier

I started saving Frequent Flier miles because it cost $500 to fly cross-country and back. Now, years later, I have enough FF miles to fly cross-country round-trip FREE...but it'll cost $500 for my baggage.

Dalton Hammond

Dalton Hammond's Perfect Fried Chicken

Note: This recipe solves the age-old problem of how to batter the chicken for a flaky, crunchy crust -- D.H.

DALTON'S PERFECT FRIED CHICKEN DRUMETTES OR WINGS

Prep Time: 15 min
Cook Time: 30 min

Serves: 2 servings (6 to 10 Wings)

Ingredients

* Oil, for deep frying
* 1/2 cup buttermilk
* 1 tablespoon Emeril's Essence
* 1/2 cup flour

* 1 tablespoon paprika
* 1 tablespoon salt
* 1/4 teaspoon black pepper
* 1 cup flour

* 1 pound chicken drumettes, wings, or wingettes

Directions

In a deep fryer or high-sided skillet heat oil to 360 degrees F.

In a mixing bowl combine buttermilk, 1 tablespoon Emril's Essence and 1/2 cup flour; mix well to make a paste. In another bowl season remaining flour with paprika, salt and pepper. Dip wingettes, one at a time, into batter, theb dredge in seasoned flour. Fry immediately in hot oil, 8 minutes. Drain on paper towels. You'll need to do this in batches.

STOPPING BY COURSE NO. 1 ON A SNOWY MORNING

STOPPING BY COURSE NO. 1 ON A SNOWY MORNING

Which green this is I think I know,
I’m not quite sure, with all this snow.
My partner’s ball is in the trees
In cold wet stuff up to his knees.

He sighs and moans to show his grief
And asks if he can take relief.
I nod OK, but how’d I know
He’d leave a patch of yellow snow?

©2010, Dalton Hammond

ELECTIONMAGEDDON

Obama thought he was cute, calling the blizzard a 'Snowmageddon'.


A lot of folks think what Obama and the Democratic party really need to fear is:

"Electionmageddon"


-- Dalton Hammond

Be sure to visit http://electionmageddon.weebly.com/index.html

THE DOMAIN NAME "ELECTIONMAGEDDON.COM" IS FOR SALE.
Email domaininfo@electionmageddon.com

Tiger Woods Won't Be Back

Tiger won't be coming back.

You can bet on it. Tiger Woods isn't coming back. He wouldn't be the first to withdraw completely from public view. Think of Howard Hughes or J.D. Salinger.

He has nothing to return to but humiliation and jeers. Certainly neither Tiger nor his bride have any interest in getting back together, so that's out. He doesn't need the money, and his career train is so completely derailed that his dream of breaking Jack Nicklaus' record in the majors hasn't got a chance of coming true.

Besides, he now has the one thing he has desired since his golf shoes first pranced on public stage: PRIVACY! He's now free to be himself -- whoever Tiger Woods really is -- and enjoy himself, and his girl friends or boy friends, whoever, outside of public view.

In all his life, with all his money, he's never had his freedom before.

Tiger won't be back.

-- Dalton Hammond